The purpose of these proverbs is to teach people wisdom and discipline, and to help them understand wise sayings… people will receive instruction in discipline, good conduct, and doing what is right, just, and fair... will make the simpleminded clever.” Proverbs 1: 2-4 NLT
Charles B. Fleming

Proverbs stresses the importance of a disciplined life. There is little effective leadership without self-discipline. Here are a few thoughts:

• Self-discipline is… 1) being able to discern right from wrong; and 2) having the inner strength to choose the right, consistently. None of us has either the discernment or the will-power to be truly self-disciplined on our own. God offers them both to those who seek him and are willing to say both ‘No!’ and ‘Yes!’ to themselves.

• Self-discipline means saying ‘No!’ to ourselves – Grace was never intended as an excuse for self-indulgence. Titus 2: 12 (NIV) tells us that grace “teaches us to say ‘No’ to ungodliness… to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives.” But, the grace that teaches us self-discipline is not self-focused. It is NOT about making us good enough to please God. Christ has already done that by his sacrifice. In Jesus’ life and death we see modeled for us the kind of disciplined life God wants from us. Jesus’ focus was outside himself. He disciplined himself so as to better serve others (Heb 12: 2-3; Heb 10: 5-9; Phil 2: 5-8). Love is both the motivation and the power to ruthlessly say No to the self. To let Christ have his way in our lives is to see our ability-to-say-No-to-ourselves increase.

• Self-discipline means saying ‘Yes!’ to ourselves. As parents and leaders we often have to say, “Yes! I will grow in an area of life that is not natural or easy for me.”

  Some parents, because of temperament or training, instinctively deal with their children with a controlling/ corrective approach. As time goes on they may find their children becoming discouraged or enraged (Eph. 6: 4). Such a parent needs to say, Yes, I will strive to become more affirming! And the reverse is also true: the parent whose default drive is to affirm and never confront may need to become more corrective if they want to properly prepare their child for life.

  All of us in leadership will find that, if we are to properly serve the people we are responsible for, we will need to grow in areas in which we are uncomfortable. Based on our temperaments or gifts we may be either a Doer or Thinker or Feeler or Relater. Responsible leadership means we will continue to serve out of our greatest strength, but we must also develop some degree of competence in areas that do not come naturally to us. Doers may need to spend more time Thinking and planning. Thinkers may need to do some more Do-ing. Relaters may need to spend more time alone, catching up on some necessary Thinking, or planning. Feelers may need to control some of those feelings and get more involved in Do-ing. This can mean forcing ourselves to change our attitudes towards, or to develop skills in, areas where our people need us to grow. Such change can be so time consuming and painful that it is a sacrifice. But, if that is what it takes to help people experience and value God’s mercy, then we do it. We say ‘Yes!’ Not out of guilt, but “in view of God’s mercy” and people’s need to experience God (Rom 12: 1-2)!

• Self-discipline is a factor in our confidence as leaders. The righteous are as bold as a lion (Prov. 28: 1). This is not the confidence of taking pride in our strong will-power (Col. 2: 23 KJV). It is the quiet confidence that comes from experiencing a God who gives us strength to win daily battles against on-going weaknesses and fears (Heb 12: 1-2). His strength in us impresses us more than our abiding weaknesses and fears. That was the basis for Paul’s boldness Col. 1: 29 [NIV; NLT].